Then I remembered that I was my Dad’s precious one too.
(the diary of a sugar baby)
The bag I was carrying was quite heavy, the sun was really hot and my throat was dry.
It was a new environment for me and I didn’t really know my way around, a man walked by and assisted me in carrying my load, he bought me a bottle of chilled water and got a cab to take me to my destination.
The man was just an answer to the prayers I prayed silently in my heart. The next day he came around to visit me and he took me on a tour round the city in his SUV.
He was funny, rich, handsome and married.
He came to my house every day , he came with gifts, he took me out, he calls me, texts me he was just like a father to me.
I got so attached to him that not hearing from him made me feel sick.
One evening he came over to my place, he bought me jollof rice and chicken and after I finished eating, he pecked me. I was shocked.
I saw him off to the car looking sad, he drew me close and asked me what was wrong, I told him that I didn’t like the fact that he pecked me he apologized, drew me closer and this time around he placed a kiss on my lips.
I found myself closing my eyes and enjoying the warmth from his lips. When I realized that I was lost in his arms I pulled myself away from him and went inside.I slammed the door behind me laid down on my bed and cried, I was confused, I love this man but I don’t want him as a lover. I wanted him as a friend and father
He was the first person I saw the next day and this time around he started touching me, I felt good in his warmth but I wanted to let go. When he tried to pull of my clothes I pushed him away, he placed a kiss on my fore head and left.
I felt like I should not see him again but the fear of losing him gripped me.
Two weeks later, this my father turned to be my lover. Within one year I lost my innocence to him the more I got deeper with him the more hurt I felt inside. Things changed and I wasn’t like a diamond to him anymore, he treated me less special than when I just met him.
I was lonely again and deeply hurt with pains from the scars he has given me.
His words are no longer sweet and his hands no longer warm, his heart wasn’t a place of solitude any more and more than anything I wanted to find myself again.
I couldn’t stop seeing him until one day I heard him speak to his little girl on phone with so much love and passion. I realized that he wouldn't allow any man do what he does to me to his daughter. i realized all the love he professed was fake and lies. He loved his daughter so much and he cared for her,
He always shields her and would take a bullet for her.
Then I got jacked back to reality and remembered that I am my Dad’s precious one too.I went back home that day shattered , I picked up my bible and I opened it , I saw so much promises in it for me from my dad and I wondered how I ever forgot my dad’s love and went astray.
I remembered how much he loved me and took much more than a bullet for me.
I looked into the mirror and saw a reflection of God’s love there, it was His love that made me go back home to my dad.
I saw myself wrapped up in the warmth of His love and I felt the balm of gilead healing my wounds.
It feels so good to be home wrapped up in His love and embrace again.
Thank you Jesus for saving my soul.
